


Because nothing says "Fuck you dad" like dating Karma Akabane.

by N_A_M_E_L_E_S_S



Category: Assassination Classroom
Genre: Akabane Karma is a Little Shit, Asano Gakuhou's Bad Parenting, Asano Gakushuu is Bad at Feelings, Fluff, Hilarity Ensues, Idiots in Love, Implied/Referenced Child Neglect, M/M, Marriage, Weird Fluff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-01
Updated: 2020-12-01
Packaged: 2021-03-10 02:13:38
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,442
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27816631
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/N_A_M_E_L_E_S_S/pseuds/N_A_M_E_L_E_S_S
Summary: "You take pleasure in pissing people off." "Is that A trick question? or even a question?" "Come make out with me in front of my father's office." "You hate me." "He hates you more."
Relationships: Akabane Karma/Asano Gakushuu
Comments: 39
Kudos: 415





	Because nothing says "Fuck you dad" like dating Karma Akabane.

**Author's Note:**

  * For [LoserxLoser](https://archiveofourown.org/users/LoserxLoser/gifts).



> Any of you read 'Tattoo Madness'? a good little dose of Karushuu, written by Nectorism, but the title is a genius little comment left by the hilarious human I gifted this to~

Gakushuu threw his hands down on the fiend's table as soon as all of the students had filed from the room.

Said fiend just watched him, leaned back in his chair with an amused expression. he tilted his head. "Asano." he greeted calmly, annoyingly. 

"Satan." Gakushuu greeted calmly back, using the other's proper name. the amused smile twitched into a full-bodied grin, showing far too many teeth as golden eyes glimmered. "what is it that brings you to my lowly presence?" chuckled Akabane lightly, enjoying this far too much.

"You take pleasure in pissing people off."

Akabane's shoulders shook with barely suppressed merriment. "Is that a trick question?" he paused, squinted, "is that even a question?"

Gakushuu leaned forward, lowering at the devil and ignoring his questions. "Come make out with me in front of my father's office."

Akabane, much to his credit, simply raised an annoyingly flawless eyebrow and smirked, cocking his head. If he was surprised, which Gakushuu was sure he was, he wasn't showing it.

"You hate me." Akabane deadpanned. 

Gakushuu's fingernails tapped the table impatiently. "He hates you much more," he explained, voice serious. this was a very serious matter after all. 

Akabane tipped his jaw upward, greeting Gakushuu to the rich expanse of his throat and jawline.

Gakushuu did not stare.

"Just your dad?" the redhead asked finally. Gakushuu scoffed. "Of course not," he sneered, and the demon grinned. "you want to fuck with everyone. offset the monotony."

It wasn't a question, and he didn't pursue it with an answer.

Akabane's eyes sparkled, and he hummed consideringly. He was definitely thinking about all the chaos this could spark.

"I'm in." his new boyfriend cajoled, his grin one of chaotic finality. Gakushuu nodded.

he silently jutted his chin towards the classroom door, turning without any other indication. 

he heard the demon leave his seat and fall in step beside him. It was the end of the day, and technically they weren't supposed to be roaming the halls, but who was going to stop _him_?

___

someone stopped him.

He hadn't taken into consideration the utter turmoil the sight of them together would instill in people.

but that just made the idea more attractive, honestly. He could see why Akabane liked this so much. 

"Hey! Akabane, get home!"

it was the gym teacher, and Akabane turned with a stupid grin. Gakushuu could hardly keep his eyes from rolling. "It's alright sir. He's with me."

Akabane's grin widened as the man did a double-take, looking between them. he stood there for around three seconds before he turned back to Gakushuu, eyes solemn. "my condolences." 

Akabane stuck his tongue out and blew a raspberry at the elder, but Gakushuu could _feel_ the elation rolling off of him. Gakushuu presented their elder with his most convincing frown. "Please don't be so mean to my boyfriend sir." he drawled. 

The man's eyes bugged and he seemed to gag on air.

Gakushuu's lips twitched.

Akabane downright laughed, turning to continue their walk. Gakushuu only watched the man suffer a moment longer before joining him.

"Never have I been so happy to not say anything,' the redhead informed him delightedly, and his lips twitched again.

"This was an excellent idea." is all he responded with.

when they neared their destination, Akabane stopped to look at him, brow raising in a silent question. Gakushuu checked his watch. "He should leave his office in exactly a minute and twenty seconds. now..." He looked up, a smirk forcing its way onto his face.

"Kiss me, you animal."  
The way the other's eyes flashed proved that the insult had merely been taken as a tribute, and the devil stepped forward with a wicked grin. "Want me to pin you to the wall? bet he'd shit himself~" he purred lowly, and Gakushuu didn't shudder. he was above that weakness.

"Make it look real." is all he whispered back.

Akabane took another step, until they were nose to nose, "Oh it will be."

Next thing Gakushuu knew, his spine was pressed to the cold brick of the school hallway, lips, and teeth meeting his in a surprisingly evenly matched clash. 

One of the other's hand's found his collarbone, the other hitting the wall beside them with force. Gakushuu's own hands found their place roughly gripping his collar. 

_Kissing Karma Akabane was like swallowing fire_ he realized, and he didn't shudder. he wouldn't, but he wanted to.

when Akabane pulled back to gasp in air he spoke.

"You're good at this." He stated. 

"yeah."

"why?"

The redhead laughed, lyrical and bright. "3-E was an odd class." was his smiling rejoinder, and then his eyes flashed like pirates gold and he lunged again. Gakushuu settled a hand in his hair and tugged, smirking a little at the diminutive noise he won in response. 

When they heard the office door swing open they grinned so hard their teeth clacked together. 

When Gakushuu heard a quiet gasp from behind Akabane, he beamed brighter than he ever fucking had. He grinned so hard his cheeks hurt, and Akabane opened his eyes to give Gakushuu avid eyes and an unruly grin. his shoulders were shaking, but he looked anything but afraid. he was containing laughter, Gakushuu realized with a start, and leaned back in. this time he made sure that seconds later, when they pulled back again, a string of saliva connected them. 

a little bit vulgar, but his father, to put it in Akabane language, might shit. 

Gakushuu had never been happier, his heart soaring even higher when the principal cleared his throat, his voice breaking partway through. 

Karma groaned in irritation, and if it was fake it was a damn good one. hm? when did he start addressing him as Karma in his head? the boy backed off a ways, until the string of spit connecting them snapped, and the previous heat that had enveloped Gakushuu's front was torn away.

he didn't shudder. 

Gakuhou's expression was one not unlike hysteria, and it brought a foul smile to his lips, his eyes glimmering. "Well?" he asked.

One word... one word that carried so much meaning.

_'Well, what are you going to do now? Well, you just showed an unbelievable amount of weakness. Well, what is there to be angry at me for?'_

"Oh by the way," sang Karma keenly, "in case the information hasn't reached you, _sir_..." his eyes were brimming with electric energy, and Gakushuu could feel the thrill rising off of him. his lips twitched, and this time he let them settle into an odd smile.

"we tied on Midterms." Karma drove the dagger in. Gakushuu watched his father's jaw tighten and the muscles of his throat shake.

_'Well, what are you going to do now? We're equaled, him and I. And now, we're an item.'_

Gakuhou's mouth opened, and stayed that way for a second, and Gakushuu wondered if he would have heard the elder softly wheeze were he closer. His mouth clicked closed and opened again, and Gakushuu's thundering pulse joined the suppressed laugh building in his throat.

"I'll be going to my boyfriend's house tonight father, so don't wait up for me." he directed, keeping his voice even. "That's right," Karma echoed, "and if he pulls out even one study book I'm burning it."

the look on his father's face was heartbreaking. he loved it.

Karma cleared his throat, drawing his attention to his extended hand. Gakushuu stared for a second before it clicked and he smirked, gripping it in his own. 

it was weird. unntural.

"Good day, _director_." 

the man didn't speak as Karma led him away, and Gakushuu didn't look back.

Karma broke into quiet, manic giggles as they rounded the corner, but his grip only tightened on his hand.

Gakushuu didn't shudder.

they waited until they were a good distance away before they actually said any words, just basking in the silence. by the time one of them did speak, Karma was opening the main door for him with a curtsey and Gakushuu was rolling his eyes at him.

"How long are we going to keep this up?" queried Karma.

He shrugged, not really thinking about it in the heat of his need to piss off his father. "However long we want to, I suppose. Until it bores us."

He didn't realize what meaning the words held until he said them, until he watched Karma's eyes flicker like that. "'Until it bores us'..." Karma murmured. "I like that. 'Hope you mean it though, 'cause..." he trailed his eyes over Gakushuu, smirking lopsidedly, "I don't think I'll be getting bored for a while."

Gakushuu's lips twitched. "try to keep up," he responded. Karma cocked his head. "But _I'm_ the only one who knows the way to my house!" 

Gakushuu blinked at him. "oh.. you don't have to... I can just stay with Ren..."

he was caught off guard briefly, and that was his mistake. The devil grinned at him, wicked and winsome, and clutched his hand harder. (he'd never let go, had he?)

"Nonsense. You're my boyfriend after all," he snickered.

___

"You alright with curry for dinner Asano?"

Gakushuu hummed where he sat on Karma's couch. "call me Gakushuu."

Karma turned back to him, lopsided grin in place. "For how long~?"

His lips twitched. 

"Until it bores me." he drawled, tone amused. 

"Gakushuu..." Karma rolled the name in his mouth. Gakushuu didn't shudder.

"Hm~ Alright Gakushuu, call me Karma then."

_'I already have been.'_ he didn't say.

___

That next day, when he went home, he was greeted with the oddest of expressions as his father answered the door. It was somewhere between rage, despair, and exhaustion. 

He moved past the man into the house, removing his shoes silently. his smirk didn't wane as he stepped towards the stairs, pausing just as his foot hit the first step. he didn't look back as he said, "He can cook too."

he didn't hear a replay until he was halfway down the upstairs hallway. 

"I love my dead gay son!" came a call from below. Gakushuu broke down laughing, right then and there. what was he supposed to make of that!?

one thing was for sure at least. he was happy. and he certainly wasn't bored.

he wouldn't be for a long while.

___

"But- Asano, why would you want the delinquent when I'll let you have all of _this.._?"

Gakushuu blinked, utterly unimpressed at the girl latched to his arm. she had guts, he'd admit, but not brains. she squished her breasts into his upper arm and he felt repulsion crawl up his spine.

He didn't shudder.

"I'm afraid that he's all I want at this moment. You don't even come close."

"well-" her eyes flickered in irritation, "How long are you two gonna be together!?"

he could hardly blame her for her foolish words. this was high school after all.

he grinned sharply anyway. "Until it bores us, of course."

and around the corner, Karma smiled, warm and bright. trusting.

"until it bores us..." he repeated quietly.

___

Gakushuu stood still, nervous for the first time in a while, gulping under the gaze of crystalline eyes.

the shorter boy tapped his fingers thoughtfully on his arm, his stare hard.

the boy was putting out a deadly aura, shadowy and cold, and Gakushuu wondered for not the first or last time what that teacher taught them.

Shiota began taking slow, methodical steps towards him, his eyes deadly, and Gakushuu felt sweat form on the back of his neck. the closer he got, the harder his heart thumped, until they were face to face and he was nearly trembling.

Gakushuu didn't shudder though.

Shiota lifted a hand, and he zeroed in on it.

it was brought up toward his face, closer and closer until he was clenching his teeth just to remain still.

it struck like lightning, and Gakushuu's mind flashed back to what Karma had said to him on the way here, his pearly fangs glinting in the sunlight:

_"Don't flinch."_

He steeled his nerves, locked his eyes with Shiota's Ignored his racing heart, despite the fact that a huge part of his brain was telling him he was about to die-

A light tap on his nose.

"Boop." Shiota deadpanned. 

Gakushuu gaped at him.

a cordial smile.

"You passed." Shiota said warmly. Karma's laughter hit the air, and Gakushuu closed his open mouth.

Shiota's eyes twinkled knowingly, and he gave Gakushuu a meaningful look. 

"Welcome to the End Class family."

Gakushuu smiled.  
___

Karma stood alone on his graduation day, frowning as his golden eyes flicked over the crowd, looking for faces he knew wouldn't be there. his heartbeat was a hollow ache in his chest and he wondered faintly why he felt so far away. it was like he was back home, alone, in the soundless.

it was then that a hand found his own, pulling him back to earth. his eyes met a pair of twinkling violet ones. the boy- no, man now- tilted his head, making his tassel sway over his eyes. "You'll buy a house with me, won't you Karma?"

he blinked, lips parting a little. "you... want us to live together?"

the other smirked. "Until it bores us." murmured.

Karma didn't care. he hugged him, right then and there, fuck their peers. 

Gakushuu let him. "I promise," he murmured, "the house will never be silent."

And it never was. the hum of the coffeepot, the back-and-fourth banter, the pitter-patter of a cat's little paws... he didn't know that yet, but he could imagine something similar.

"thank you," he whispered. Gakushuu hugged him back.

___

Gakushuu stared in awe at the email on his laptop, Karma leaning with his arms crossed on the back of Gakushuu's new office chair. 

"...business trips. for months. to America." 

he wasn't even sure which one of them said that. he leaned back, looked up at his boyfriend. Karma looked... scared. he could see the questions circulating in the other's eyes, questions about them, questions about the future, questions about everything.

The redhead bit his lip.

"Will we still... are we still..." Karma stammered, and it was a painful display. Gakushuu brought a hand up, upside down as it was, and cupped the other's cheek. "Of course. I told you," his lips twitched, "Until it bores us."

the insecurity faded from golden eyes, a smirk taking its place. "If you die in America," jeered Karma, "I'm going to pour whiskey on your grave."

Gakushuu laughed pleasantly, a sound reserved for just this idiot. this single person...

"you've never broken a promise to me." it wasn't a question, but Gakushuu still answered. "Of course not. that's boring."

They kiss. Gakushuu never got used to it, he never will. Kissing Karma Akabane is like swallowing fire, and it's the most delicious thing Gakushuu's ever tasted.

___

"Can we keep him?"

Gakushuu's eye twitched, and he pinched the bridge of his nose. he wasn't surprised, little this idiot did could do that anymore, but God, he did not get paid enough for this. he didn't get paid at all, he realized annoyedly. 

he looked up again, frowning into bright, sky blue eyes. 

it was white with black splotches, it's fur ruffled and filthy.

it, was a cat. a kitten, more accurately, that his ohhh so amazing boyfriend dangled in his face. 

"If you wanted a cat," he hissed, "we could have gotten a pedigree."

Karma tsked. "Oh Gakushuu, don't be a snob! look at his cute little face!"

he shoved the beast further into his face.

He growled.

"Karma," he stated, "We are not..." he trailed off as two tiny black and white paws reached up to press the bridge of his nose.

he blinked.

it mewled. 

"...I get to name it." 

Karma grinned, practically glowing. he wrapped his free arm around Gakushuu and squeezed with all his might. "Thank you, thank you, thank you!"

Gakushuu smiled, rolling his eyes as he looked down at the new member of the family.

"so what are you going to name him?"

he smirked.

___

Gakuhou frowned when he locked eyes with Gokuhou, the latter tilting his head.

they stared each other down for a good thirty seconds before Gakuhou mewed and Gakuhou scowled. 

the man looked ridiculously out of place in their warmly colored house, now even more so that he was frowning thoughtfully down at a little kitten.

the smaller creature licked its chops, itching at its neck with its back foot and turning the bowtie a bit.

"...this isn't funny," Gakuhou stated.

Karma was elated. "Don't listen to the old guy Gakuhou, I think you're adorable~" he simpered, and Gakushuu couldn't stop the grin on his face.

"...You're not cute." Gakuhou grumbled. "mew" replied Gakuhou.

Gakuhou's scowl deepened. "Keep telling yourself that..." he muttered bitterly. Karma raised a brow, flashing his boyfriend a look. "clearly this isn't a conversation meant for us," his boyfriend directed. Karma nodded in agreement.

They excused themselves silently to the kitchen, snickering.

And minutes later, when they poked their heads back in, their newest family member was curled up, purring happily in the man's lap as he pet him.

"You're not cute." Gakuhou huffed. Gakuhou didn't respond.

"I'm glad your father approves of our child," Karma said. Gakushuu huffed. "Our child? I don't think-" "I hate both of you." Gakuhou deadpanned, "and I hate your child. I wish you two never got together." 

He said this even as Gakuhou stretched out and poked his little claws into Gakuhou's expensive pants.

Karma gasped, mock-offended. "How could you say that!? I've been nothing but a great influence."

"You're the farthest thing from a good fluence I've ever had," Gakushuu deadpanned. "Mew," Gakuhou added. Gakushuu glared.

"Shut up Gakuhou, your parents are having a discussion."

Gakuhou blinked. Karma looked elated. other Gakuhou looked to be experiencing every stage of grief at once.

all was right in the world.

___

"Honestly, they should pay me more for working on April 1st, today was hectic, and the number of times I almost set the place on fire-"

he cut himself off as he turned, his mouth suddenly very dry.

Karma, who he'd previously been complaining too, wore a wicked grin, his eyes twinkling...

he tilted his head up from where he knelt on one knee, cocking his head. 

Gakushuu wanted to kick him.

"...It's April fools." He stated.

Karma just raised an annoyingly flawless eyebrow, holding the little black box a little higher.

"I hate you." He stated.

Karma's lips twitched.

"I am going to remove your kneecaps with a screwdriver." He stated.

Karma was grinning now.

...he sighed, crossing his arms. "Well, make your pitch."

Karma stayed silent, a rarity, and simply opened the box.

Inside was a simple hematite ring, a silver infinity symbol carved into the top. he looked back to Karma, who shrugged, his smile melting into something much softer. "Until it bores us," he spoke softly, his eyes glowing like candlelight. Gakushuu's heart melted, and he smiled. "Until it bores us," he repeated. Karma slid the ring onto his finger, the stone cool against his skin.

Gakushuu shuddered.

the weight of forever wrapped around his left ring finger.

_'until it bores us.'_

___

"You mean to tell me," Gakuhou's voice dragged over the phone, "that you got Engaged."

"Yes."

"and then married that same day."

"yes."

"On April 1st."

"Yes."

"And you took Akabane's name."

"yes."

te silence stretched on, and Karma's eyes sparkled with mirth where he sat listening in.

"I wish I never had you. No other being in existence pisses me off more than you. I'm disowning you."

Gakushuu had never heard such beautiful words.

"Well," Karma interjected, " _technically_ you can't disown him anymore, since he's an Akabane and al-"

The line went dead.

Karma leaned into him, and they broke down into deep, bellowing laughter, happiness circulating the house in ways that neither of them ever experienced prior to each other.

They laughed until little Gakuhou stuck his head on their joined shoulders from behind and meowed in concern and even then they laughed.

laughed, because they were happy. happy like they never knew before.

"How long will we torment him?" asked Karma through the mirth.

Gakushuu turns, looking his universe in its golden eyes. he reaches one hand up to scratch Gakuhou between the ears, and the other down to grip his love's hand. he leans down to plant the most tender of kisses on Karma's wedding band. he watches the silver symbol gleam in the light of their bedroom and smiles.

"Until it bores us," he promises.

"Until it bores us."


End file.
